
Fear and trepidation consumes the air, the sound waves are buzzing, the people are scared.
Word is there is a Socialist in our midst; he has come with a doomsday device to transform our politics.
He will spread the wealth and take our guns; he will steal our property and our loved ones.
While eating our children he will end fighting abroad, no more killing foreigners for fear of Jihad.
Yes, there is a Socialist in our midst, we must do something, quick, inform the President!
My dear President, did you not hear? There is a socialist I’m afraid, a socialist quite near.
Since you are in charge, what shall we do! Where shall we run, what has this world come too!
The President then said, as calm as a cat, “Yes you are right my friend, it is time we should act.
Gather your clothes, enough food to feed three, we will run for the hills, for this cannot be.
But before I leave, before the socialist can mold, there are some things I must do, there is precedence to uphold.
Although I promised to close Guantanamo Bay, and execute the offenders of that aweful 9/11 day,
I will leave it open for another day or two, let the innocent rot and the military prosecute.
Iraq I will close, but only in theory you see, for if this war should end, how would the defense contractors get money?
But in Afghanistan, oh, we must be tough! I heard there are still a couple Al Qaeda there, is 40,000 troops enough?
And do worry my friends, if the socialist is in our midst, there will be no escaping the government wrath, we will find him quite quick.
For his house will be wire tapped, I guarantee you that, if there is even a socialist pin drop we will be there in no time flat.
For I am in this for the people, the healthcare bill you see! Everyone will have healthcare now, it won’t be too much money.
Just debt for the next eternity, a few bonds here and there, but hey at least the insurance companies are happy, thank God their pockets aren’t bare!
The final act I must perform before we all run to our mothers, is to make sure that Wall Street’s needs are met, that they are safe beneath the covers.
Money they need to avoid a collapse, so money they shall get. A trillion in interest free loans, perhaps, I hope they don’t object.
For while the rest of you were loosing jobs and homes every single day, Wall Street bankers faced the greatest challenge, for their 10th yacht they could not pay.
The idea that they caused the crisis is a non-issue you see, for I have retained those who failed to see this all coming, but they swear they did their job perfectly.
So a slap on the wrist, a cut in bonuses perhaps, these are negligible details since I got my million from Goldman Sachs.
So yes, yes I do agree. A socialist in our midst? This cannot be.
We must take action, we must not delay, but before we do anything, let’s see what Wall Street has to say.